It’s been awhile since we updated everyone on things, and this seems like a particularly pivotal time to do so. June 14th is my last day of service as associate pastor of Christ The King Church, Kenosha, WI, where I’ve been privileged to serve for the past three years on staff, and where, more importantly, Elyse and I have been built up into Jesus for the past 7 years.
Our relationships and experiences at Christ The King have been instrumental in both our personal sanctification and in our sense of call toward church planting, specifically a multiethnic church, and ministering to the poor and marginalized. I’ve become a little bit better at preaching, a little bit better at leading, and I hope both spring from being a little bit better learner of Jesus, my King. I’m fully aware of my deficiencies as His student, but nonetheless there is an unwavering commitment to keep at it since where else could I go to find the words of eternal life?
Last spring, beginning in March, the Lord provided interactions and connections that would begin the process of assessing my fitness in helping to plant and pastor a church with the Christian and Missionary Alliance. The process is underway, put on hold due to COVID-19, and there should be news of when it will formally conclude coming soon. It seems likely that our 4 day long assessment interview will take place either late 2020 or early 2021. I am expecting to be affirmed as a church planter based on previously agreed upon conditions that both myself and the C&MA believe are wise and good. But until the process gets back moving, we are in a season of unknowns. And even with the expectation to be affirmed, the process must confirm that, and that too is still an unknown.
Why then is there a “growing confidence” as the title suggests? There are so many unknowns. We are still trying to discern how the Lord will provide financially in the immediate future. We don’t know which church will become our new home as we wait for the Lord’s timing to plant. We don’t know how different life will be when Baby Boy Cyr arrives in about 4 weeks. We don’t know when the Lord will introduce me to my future co-pastor who will be a partner in ministry for the long haul. And those are just the things we’re waiting on that are on the radar! None of us knows what Tomorrow brings, and the best laid plans may unravel for any number of unexpected reasons.
I want to share two reasons why there is a growing confidence in spite of the appearances and uncertainties of life.
First, I am confident it was the Lord who introduced me to the Christian and Missionary Alliance and led me to become part of the family. From early on in the process, I felt the bond of kindred spirits, a shared passion for the gospel and the mission of Jesus world-wide, and a heart for discipleship and evangelism that leads to relentless efforts to seek and save the lost and multiply gatherings of Jesus’ people throughout the world. As of late, I have been so encouraged by the denomination’s efforts to give space for African American leaders to speak and lead, and for the embracing of reconciliation and justice from the very top leadership. This was not something I was aware of prior to starting this journey. But God was aware, and He was making our paths straight and connecting us to a people burdened for the very things that churned in my heart and led to pursuing a call to plant in the first place.
Second, the Lord has been doing a deep and difficult refinement of my character for most of the past year. He’s been uprooting sin, patiently yet unswervingly calling me to courageous engagement, and showing me how insufficient I am in and of myself that I might be humbled and broken to depend more fully on Jesus Christ. In many ways, I’ve bristled at this work. My flesh dies slowly and continues to insist on its own way. But the process has confirmed what I knew in part, and now know with a bit more certainty, that I’m in it for the long haul, because Jesus’ call is to deny self and follow Him…and I want Him.
Don’t get me wrong, pastoring is a joy. Serving the church is such a fantastic thing. But I am insufficient for these things, and if I walk in my own strength…even some of the time and only in part…the weight will crush me. The Lord has always known this because these things are too great for any man, and He has been kind to instruct me through experience that I might surrender to Him and His ways.
This gives me confidence, because this experience and the trials of life will not be in vain. Though the path forward is not clearly marked and mapped out, the journey has begun. The Lord is preparing my heart to minister the gospel among a people who in the same moment have the ability to see the best and worst in me on any given day. He’s putting courage in my heart to recognize that I don’t need to be something I’m not, and, in fact, it’s in living to who I am in Christ that people will rally, not around me, but around Jesus as I use my gifts to point them Godward. Courage grows my confidence, because I know it’s been given to me from Him.
Thank you for walking with us along this winding road called life. There are so many chapters yet to be written, but each detail is known by the Father of lights, and He will get glory as we walk with His Son by His Spirit.
Let us continue to press on toward the goal together, anticipating our God to move among us.
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